Fountain o' Poo

Rock news is a little slow while I spend time getting pooped on. Little baby waited till momma was gone and his diaper was off before unleashing a projectile poo the likes of which I've never seen. I would say a good 2 to 3 foot arc of yellow-green goodness all over everything: my pants, shirt, socks, the couch, carpet, blanket, cats. Some would find this disgusting. I thought he was experimenting in an abstract expressionist form. Very Pollock-ish. His artistic tendencies are strong already. I would have took a picture but I was the canvas. I tried to discuss his initial work and the significance of it in terms of emotion and philosophy, but he's a snob and just farted and went to sleep.