Reviews

My Boy: cutest baby of all time, ever.

Mike Patton with new band on Conan: super-lame. song was Boringsville, and I want to hear Patton bust out those pipes, not growl a verse then double up a LAME chorus with a chick. where have all my heroes gone? impress me, dammit! I'm halfway through the peeping tom album on myspace right now and it's boring me to tears. I know y'all are superfans but I think you'd have to agree this is subpar quality work.

The Raconteurs: hooray! this album is totally cool...Willy T. you are crazy, boy. Stylistically all over the map and the harmonies are wonderful! Plus it's so old-school in a pleasant way.

New Tool: Disappointment. Artwork is the coolest I've ever seen, but fellas, put some effort into the music! Every song sounds like the song Schism from the last album. Enough of the pull-offs and hammer-ons already! (a little guitar technique reference there) Maybe this album will grow on me like the last few Tool records, but I don't know if I want to give it the chance...I'm just hurt inside.

New Pearl Jam: hooray!! This is a sweet album! They just keep on keepin on and I dig it. Well crafted songs and catchy hooks in a cool way...(unlike Patton's new "poppy" hooks which sound like they're written by an angry 14 year old girl--example: "Mojo" chorus, I mean, who wrote that, Snoop Dogg?)

the movie Hostel: Rad, Rad, Rad. Much better than I expected. I even watched it twice AND put it on my Ipod. Ahh...sweet, sweet Ipod.
Making friends obsolete since christmas '05.

Fountain o' Poo

Rock news is a little slow while I spend time getting pooped on. Little baby waited till momma was gone and his diaper was off before unleashing a projectile poo the likes of which I've never seen. I would say a good 2 to 3 foot arc of yellow-green goodness all over everything: my pants, shirt, socks, the couch, carpet, blanket, cats. Some would find this disgusting. I thought he was experimenting in an abstract expressionist form. Very Pollock-ish. His artistic tendencies are strong already. I would have took a picture but I was the canvas. I tried to discuss his initial work and the significance of it in terms of emotion and philosophy, but he's a snob and just farted and went to sleep.

The Obsession Begins

I'm concerned with the direction this blog may take.

Miles Leonard

Up In Smoke

a short drive out to Renner tonight proved too long for one tired old dog. The van's got a crooked axel or a broken hip flexor or something and was stinky stinky smokey smokey. It barely made it back without the tire exploding.
But it got us there to ROCK the Snot out of Renner, SD!
Special thanks to all our very berry friends and fans for coming out!
WE couldn't do it without you!
You make all the melted tires worth it.
I love you.
I think we should get a little place together.

That means we won't see you out-of-towners for a while, but take heart: if you go to the local newspaper's website you'll see a slice of my head doing my best Gene Krupa.

Hippie Slayer

I wish I could set a trap involving lighting that shitty pitchouli(sp) incense at one end of a woodchipper then put flyers everywhere and watch the hippies come and totally just die. And please Jesus Lord take your shitty jam bands with you. I just can't take it anymore. You make me want to drive a company car to a corporate conglomerate. I want to shop at Walmart and put gas in my Suburban. I want to golf in a polo at the country club. I want to catch live music at the Thirsty Duck. I want to make out with Ronald McDonald. I love Nick Lachey and really feel his new tunes.

waakachika waakachika waakachika waakachika waakachika waakachika waakachika waakachika waakachika waakachika waakachika waakachika waakachika waakachika

On bass, Derek Smalls, he wrote this