Sick Day Movie Review

I watched some flicks today and yesterday, and now I will tell you about them:

Coffee and Cigarettes: I thought this movie would be cool cause there are a lot of people I like, but it was totally boring. It was basically 11 random conversations over, you guessed it, coffee and cigarettes. What was funny was the only good scenes were by musicians and the ones with actors were snoozers. Jack and Meg White had quite an interesting convo about a Tesla coil, and Gza and Rza from the Wutang had a good convo with a real funny cameo from Bill Murray. If you get this movie, only watch these two scenes or you'll wish you had died.

The Village: I had heard there was a dumb twist/ending to this movie, but I thought it was sweet. It kept me interested and that's all...that's mostly what matters. Except I think Adrian Brody is an overacting tard.

SAW: This movie rocks. If you haven't seen it, do yourself a favor. My jaw hurt when it was over. The twist at the end is super cool.

coming soon: Bridget Jones' diary 2. I'll have to ask the wife how this one turns out, cause you're not gonna get me to watch this crap.

Note: Due to a serious sinus infection, I now look like that one villain from Dick Tracy. Just a heads up. It's still me, so don't freak out.

The Poisonation of the D

harsh.
the damage continues.
threats be damned.
ground-up aconite in my soup.
wittle me down to nothing,
then take my stuff.
my leather jacket with shoulder pads.
my ACDC box set.
my personalized SD keychain.
my naked pics of Bea Arthur.

"no funny business, I've got my rhythm section inside watchin my back."


in less than 2 short weeks, sleepeater will be laying down brilliance in MN.
unless it sucks, of course, and that will be my fault.

Sympathy for the Devil

I am sick.
I am quite sure the wife gave me this sickness.
Cookies make me feel better, so make me a batch.
At least it's spring break so I can be sick in peace.

I've lost my mojo.
Has anyone seen my mojo?

NOTE: the criminal mentioned in the last post is still at large. Any help in bringing this person to justice will be rewarded with a Paula Abdul album.

ATTENTION: WE HAVE AN INTRUDER!!

...This just in...

...There has been a security breach in the main terminal...

...As you may have noticed, the last few posts have not been the usual charming chatter but rather the obnoxious boisterings of a hacker. Authorities have been notified of this emergency and crews are working around the clock to bring this fugitive to justice...

...The editor wishes to apologize to any readers who may have been offended or alarmed as to the mental state of said editor. The editor reiterates that the opinions expressed by the lunatic do not necessarily reflect the opinions of sleepeater, or the members therein. In fact, Zach Sleepeater wishes to express that he is in no way affiliated with these ramblings nor any said rumors transcribed in the heretofore mentioned area of writings briefly conquistadores by said madman...

...In a press release from the sleepeater camp, Danny had this to say about the violated web log:

"Heh, heh. You said log."...

...we will keep you updated on the latest news and updates.. and news....

...any inquiries, comments, or questions can be sent to your mom...

Big Pimpin', spend your cheese on me

Well, howdy-doo.
If you were out and about last Paddy Day night, you probably didn't see me.
Not because I wasn't there, but because I was surrounded by chicks on all sides.
I don't have enough appendages to keep up with them all.
I was starting to shuffle them off to less-fortunate fellows, but they couldn't get enough of the D.
What can you do?
When you look this good it comes with the territory.
I had to break up a couple cat fights with some bitch slaps.
"Ladies, please. Just get in line and you'll get your chance to get a piece. Damn."

3 cheers for Spooncat! for layin down a saucy groove that I could get my funk on to. I think some ditties exceeded the 10 min. mark, but I couldn't keep track 'cause my arms were full of beautiful babies.

2 cheers for the chick who found my phone buried in the snow in the Brick's parking lot. Phew!! It's sad so much of my existence relies on that stupid plastic piece of technology. I don't know why I was getting all uppity about it. It's not like anyone calls me.

1 cheer for me for being a total badass. It hurts to be this pretty.

I'm Back, Baby!!

and not a moment too soon. I'm tired of getting calls from your mothers.

and I've brought the spirit of the lord with me, heeyaa!!
The tour is over and I have smote down the wicked in a 4-state area.
I'm real tired as one tends to get tired with all the smiting going on.
Smite this and smote that, tra-la-la.
you are the peach tree and I am the fuzzy.
you are the clean sink and I am the scuzzy.

you are the heathen and I am the heather.

lets hold hands in wickedness together.

ALFEETERZAIN!!

THAT MEENS SO LONG IN SWEEDEN ORE SUMTHING!!
I MITE NOT B RITING 4 AWILE CUZ IM GOING AWAY 4 AWILE:(
BUT CHEER UP BUTERCUP!! ISLE B BACK!! LOL!!!:)

Stand, Stare, and Contemplate Life

Dumb and Beautiful

A lot of people think I'm really mysterious because there is no profile picture of me. My lawyer insists I tell the truth so here it is: I am dumb. I don't know how to do that. If I could do it I would. It's only fair for you to be able to look at me. Who wouldn't want to look at me? I'm gorgeous. Like a Carole King but sassier. In fact, maybe it's a good idea if you don't see me. I've got enough crazy people following me around as it is, and I don't want to slow up traffic.

You understand.

Right?

business:
Sleepeater rocked the Brookings Mall Paintball Palace so hard last night that I broke my hip and my right jawbone. We rocked so hard we didn't even finish the last song. Once the good Lord has taken the music up to heaven, there is not much you can do, ya know?

Meter Maids: 47, the D: 1

I am often known to stop by the Quiz downtown after school to have a sammy and talk shop with Poo. I plug the meter for a little while and then keep my eyes peeled for those stuffy ladies I always mistake for mailmen. You can tell that I mistake them for mailfolk by the current score (see title.) Today's mean old bag came out of nowhere. Before I knew what was happening she was writing me up a fatty. I grabbed my coat and bolted out the door, whipped my keys out, and jumped across my hood like a total badass. The meter maid lady looked at me a little funny. I said,
"Did you just see that?"
"I was write in the middle of righting you up," was her reply. I unlocked and opened my door.
"MUAHAHAHA!" I laughed with redemption. Annoyed by my brashness, she says all pissy-like:
"I can still punch it in and you'll be fined." I get in and close my door.
"NO!" I pleaded. "bitch."

I didn't wait for a response but threw the Olds into reverse and we were out.
I WIN!! I SWORE AT AN ELDERLY LADY UNDER MY BREATH!! I AM A TOTAL BADASS!!

Right?

blasphemy

I heard on the radio today that Paul Rodgers of Bad Co. is going to be the new singer for Queen. Really? For serious? That's not cool at all. I hate it when classic bands do that. It pisses me off a little bit. I mean, what's next? The next thing you know the Doors will reunite but use a frontman like that turd from the Cult.

Oh. wait.