Grill Up This

Nuttys would have totally sucked if it wasn't for you.

We're going to be on TV now. I'll let you know when.

There is a change afoot in my friend Lukewarm. He's a different fella to say the least. It's beyond weird.

Did I mention that I hate hippies so bad? Especially ones that move in next door. Die. Die, die, die. I don't care. Here's a giant stereotype. Step into it...that's a good hippie.

So, at the show, Lukewarm hit his snare so hard he broke it during the second song. Ouch. No one noticed but him, but that was enough. My bro C Murda made a run for a replacement and won the prize for cool-dude-of-the-night.
Second set, Jack Lazer is having trouble with a git fiddle. What can you expect from something made in 1964? Technical difficulties did not prevent Sleepeater from making fun of yuppie scum. Remember American Psycho? Die Yuppie Scum.

There is a collabo in progress that is bound to be tits mcgee. I can't spill it quite yet, but the hip hoppers will love it.

C Murda made it up a curb on a skateboard the other night. Congrats.

C Murda is a stupid nickname...come up with something better. C Turkelton?

This particular post is too codified. It reminds me of one William Tragedy. Too much secret, personal info...quit that shit, dammit! It makes me feel like I'm not in the game. Hunter is dead, dead, dead. Move on. Speak unmetaphorically...everyone loves Joey Castillo, he rocks!, don't be jealous. Billy Vice is my favorite incarnation. Brilliance. Nothing to get in the way of pure songwriting genius.

I am pasty and white and chubby with a couple of chins and it makes me sick.

Invite me to your BBQ. I'll bring a big slab of meat. I'll also bring something to cook on the grill.

I Want To Eat My Baby

Reigning Champs

Reigning Cutest Baby Champ:

Miles.

Reigning Music Played In The Lobby Of Hell:

The Tired, Diseased Genre of the Jam Band. My mom was right. The devil does have angels working here on earth. They make me want to commit murder. Postman style. Sometimes I dream about it then wake up in sweats and tears of joy. Then I walk into the kitchen and drink Drano.

Reigning TV show: Supergroup on VH1. Honorable Mention: Behind the Music of Nick Lachey.

Reigning Acts Which Perhaps Should Have Gone Down In A Blazing Plane Crash Or Alcohol-Induced-Vomit-Choke-Death In Order To Preserve A Small smidgen Of Dignity And Artistic Integrity: The rest of Lynyrd Skynyrd. The rest of queen. Paul Rodgers. Tool. (I tried to give this more listens by leaving it in my car stereo; here are some statements overheard: "What the hell is going ON? Do something! Start a song already! I get it! You're artistic! But when will you give me the rockage? I would cry right now if my dead, black soul would allow it!") Dave Navarro. Anthony Kiedis. Ted Nugent. (Not to save any non-existent integrity, of course, but so I could see an actual talented lead guitar player on Supergroup. Like Steve Howe or Jeff Beck or Steve Vai or Satriani or Nick Lachey.) U2. George Bush.

Reigning Old Rockers Doin' It, Baby!: Neil Young. Staying relevant. Still writing some pretty songs. Wants to impeach the president. All of this while "Rockin in the Free World" is raped by every bar band in the world. Drano, Mr. Young?

Reigning Pop Prince: Nick Lachey. His new album is a touching and sensitive inside look at Nick's tragic personal problems. His unexpected, surprising divorce being among them. I just want to hug him up, ya know? Then we'd go to the gym and sweat it out.

Reigning Incredulous Surreal Moment: David Lee Roth's Tonight Show performance of Van Halen's "Jump". Backed by a bluegrass band. Of any song in the VH catalogue to "rework" bluegrass, "Jump" is the big winner? One would think that if a certain song was acoustified or banjoed-up or hickified or deliveranced, the singer would take a different approach to compensate, but no. Roth belted out sour notes the same as he always didn't. Then I walked to the kitchen and drank Drano.

Reigning Band I Can't Stop Listening To: The Magic Numbers. This is such a great band. Look up their performance on Conan over at youtube. The album is so cool. I listen to it so much but just can't get burned out! It's like magic!

Know what else is magic? You... And Nick.